Gridskipper

grid skipper

This month, the web’s snarkiest travel blog sizes up German karaoke, French bar snacks and a monster night out in Madrid

“WE’RE going to watch a cabaret at the Monster’s pit, wanna come?” Of course, we couldn’t say no. That’s how we discovered The Sideral Club (9 Calle de San Joaquin), an indie bar in Malasaña, Madrid. It plays host to a mixture of techno, indie and Brit pop, and picks up after midnight. Inside, it looks like a dark garage, illuminated by starlight and packed with a crowd of 1920s-hipster-meets-goth types. The club is well known for its shooters and it’s not uncommon to find everyone drinking body shots here. Each Thursday, the downstairs turns into the “Parada de los Monstruos” (or Monster Stop), where they have free minishows that could be anything from a poetry recital to a spoof of The Rocky Horror Show.

If that sounds a little too participatory, try karaoke in Berlin. For introverts, this may seem torturous, but watching Germans sing is a guaranteed good time. Who else would take such pride in belting out that Scorpions classic Wind of Change, while dressed entirely in stonewashed denim? It’s like a musical freak show with drinks. At Berolina Bowling (3 Kleiststrasse), “cosmic bowling” will give karoake fans something else to do while waiting for their turn to sing. And, since everyone looks terrifying in black light, you won’t have to worry about making an ass of yourself on stage.

If you like your nights out a bit more traditional, try one of London’s most authentic pubs. For every splendid Victorian pub in London, there’s a crapload of identical chain bars serving overpriced, badly kept beer. Yet London does have a number of gloriously decked-out, historical places to try. Sink a swift one in The Cross Keys (31 Endell Street, WC2), the frontage of which is covered with hanging baskets and plants. Inside, the interior is similarly stuffed with old paintings, Beatles memorabilia, plastic fish and copper kettles. Need further excuses? Consider these words from London’s fourth-best playwright and Shakespeare’s pal, Ben Jonson: “Drink today, and drown all sorrow; You shall perhaps not do it tomorrow; Best, while you have it, use your breath; There is no drinking after death.”

And if you need a little something to snack on while morbidly drowning your sorrows, try Paris, a city where peanuts and popcorn are ubiquitous and the concept of something for nothing has yet to catch on among bar owners. Still, good free bar snacks do exist if you know where to look. Head to Le Bar du Plaza Athénée (25 Ave Montaigne). At about €25 a pop, a cocktail at this stylish bar doesn’t come cheap, which is why one must arrive with an appetite to make the most of the haute nibbles. Staff serve up green olives and still-warm cheese puffs that will have you weeping for more. The Plaza also employs the latest in high-tech drinks menus in the form of touch-responsive consoles. Lovely, but challenging after the second drink, to be sure. www.gridskipper.com